Wednesday, June 02, 2010

The Gores At the Tippering Point

I've hated Tipper Gore ever since she started her anti-music crusade when I was a teenager; if that pious freedom-hating prude had had her way, it would have been illegal for me to buy most of my favorite albums. I've hated Al Gore ever since I heard him give a speech saying that for save-the-earth reasons, nobody should have more than two kids (what bothered me wasn't the sentiment itself so much as knowing it came from a hypocrite who already had four children at the time). And now the Gores are separating, after being married longer than I've been alive.

Too bad. If they're separating that presumably means they'll no longer be having sexual relations, which means I'll never live out my personal fantasy of learning the two of them died after choking on each other in flagrante soixante-neuf. Dang.

2 Comments:

Blogger The NE Curmudgeon said...

I could have gone on with my day quite happily without having that image in my mind. Thanks OH SO much. : P

8:43 AM  
Blogger Kevin Carson said...

I used to work with a nurse who had this fantasy execution method for patients she really hated: give him a spinal block from the neck down, tie him naked to a table with a mirror overhead, cut off his penis and stick it in his mouth, and then let him watch himself choke to death on his own dick as he goes unconscious from blood loss.

In her defense, I have to say that this was the VA, and between watching a third of our patients at any given time to head off the DTs, and all the junkies up at the desk demanding pain meds, she wasn't much more hostile than the rest of us.

10:55 PM  

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