An American Bible Verse For Easter Weekend

And Jesus said: "For I was hungry, and you compared food-stamp recipients to animals; I was thirsty and you imposed a tax on bottled water; I was a stranger and you called the cops on me; I needed clothes and you put me on the sex-offender registry for indecent exposure; I was sick and you outlawed my medication and castigated me for being unable to afford medical insurance; I was in prison and you made a bundle since you own stock in the private prison corporation which profiteth off the misery of others ... Truly I tell you, whatever you did to one of the least of these brothers and sisters of mine, you did to me. Unless of course those brothers and sisters are gay."