Wednesday, December 05, 2007

Continuing My Legacy

If future generations remember me for only one thing, I’d hope it would be this: “Jennifer raised ‘fuck you’ to an art form.” In hopes of deserving such a reputation, here’s this week’s cover story for the Advocate: about 1300 words’ worth of me pointing out the perfidiousness of our local DMV.

If they hadn’t been such annoying pains in the ass when I tried getting a simple comment for my "Sisyphus/civil unions” article a few weeks back, this week's story would never have been written. Let that be a lesson to any government officials who try stonewalling me in the future: my boss WILL let me eviscerate you in print, so long as I promise to be funny about it.

23 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

::taking a bow::

Yes, yet again, I prove that I have NO life, being the first one to post on Jennifer's article since y'all are working

11:46 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

A MOOSE,
What more can there be to life than worshipping at the feet of Jennifer?

NS

2:20 PM  
Blogger Jennifer Abel said...

Commenting on my story at the paper? It's always good to let my editors see people actually READ MY STUFF.

At least, I sure hope they do. I'd hate to think I'm just shouting into the wind.

2:45 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

What more can there be to life than worshipping at the feet of Jennifer?

Never was much of a foot fetish guy myself. Now, other parts ::ahem::, SO, how bout them patriots?

3:25 PM  
Blogger Windypundit said...

Bad customer service at the DMV is so dog-bites-man...but discovering you can get bad DMV customer service from the comfort of your own home...nice angle.

7:46 PM  
Blogger Jennifer Abel said...

Thanks, Windy! I especially like the "silk purse/sow's ear" aspect of it. Anybody can write a decent story if they're lucky enough to stumble upon some major injustice the government's perpetrating on some innocent. But it's a lot harder to think of something to write during a slow news week.

5:51 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hmmm...decided lack of comments. I'm thinking to blow the roof off the servers trying to store the comments, you need to do a story on a Furry who was yiffin at the DMV, and got arrested, had their dog confiscated with a recommendation to put to sleep, then something happened to the dog which caused local law enforcement to get involved, and in the investigation it was discovered they had a same sex domestic partner. That would probably pull some in.

12:35 PM  
Blogger Jennifer Abel said...

And the guy had untaxed out-of-state cigarettes hidden in his closet.

9:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

And the guy had untaxed out-of-state cigarettes hidden in his closet.

Hidden between the pages of his romance novel? Which was titled "Jennifer, for Phone when you're Alone"?

10:35 AM  
Blogger Jennifer Abel said...

Just before he avoided a drunk-driving checkpoint on his way to the salon to get his naughty bits waxed before adopting a calm facial expression to prepare for his trip to the airport, yes.

11:06 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

...to prepare for his trip to the airport, yes.

After he got elected without really trying, which was because he was upset due to some teenage blogger who got tasered in a poker game for paying his taxes with a credit card and avoiding the fee, which in turn caused him or her to be taken from their parents by DCF, but it didn't matter as they had already moved out of state due to the high housing prices.


Hey, this IS the legacy post.

11:50 AM  
Blogger Jennifer Abel said...

Actually, I think he moved out of state because he was offended by the anti-Semitic cartoons some anonymous douchewit mailed him after his 22 pet lapdogs violated town zoning codes.

12:20 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

...some anonymous douchewit mailed him after his 22 pet lapdogs violated town zoning codes.

Nah, it wasn't an anon douchewit, it was a ghost, specifically a ghost of a rat, who was killed while driving a hybrid on the way to a local gun store down on Blue Black Square.

(we're gonna end up on old H&R pretty quick at this rate...)

2:11 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Just noting that it's approaching the weekly "Can Jennifer's boss get it up" watch....

11:03 AM  
Blogger Jennifer Abel said...

Considering this week's two stories, I think the more relevant question is "Even if he could get it up, why bother?"

One story MIGHT be good, depending on how much of it managed to get through the editorial process unscathed. The other one--feh. It was one of those issues I had to treat with Consideration and Sensitivity.

12:32 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

"Even if he could get it up, why bother?"

One story MIGHT be good, depending on how much of it managed to get through the editorial process unscathed.


In other words, if he gets it up too early, someone is gonna get..er..never mind

1:23 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Boss must be reading, your articles up on 4:23pm Tues. No kidding. Thanks Boss! Now, get that DAMN terms and conditions thing eliminated, and watch the hits increase and the advertising dollars roll in!!!

1:29 PM  
Blogger Jennifer Abel said...

Boss must be reading

Dear God, how I hope not.

1:41 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Once again, I prove I have no life by being the first to post on both stories!! Yay!! Where are you, SASOB? Getting lonely here

6:29 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Where are you, SASOB? Getting lonely here

Oh, I've just been something less than moblogamous lately - off reading around again. ;-)

1:04 PM  
Blogger Jennifer Abel said...

That's all right. This is an open blogging relationship. I don't care, so long as you return to me each time.

And use protection. There's all kind sof nasty viruses out there.

1:49 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

off reading around again

And obviously into Boss's pills...

4:50 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

And obviously into Boss's pills...

Hardly - I think it's rather obvious who it is being the largest erection around here.
;-)

6:09 AM  

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