Boozehounds And Fatties Can Both Drop Dead
In America there are plenty of scare stories about the "obesity epidemic", which is caused by too many Yanks eating too much junk food, and does bad things to public- health statistics. Clearly this obesity problem needs solving, and here's how: poison the nation's sugar and fat supply so anyone who eats too much will immediately drop dead, and serve as a warning to children and other impressionables.
Why not? Last week, science writer Deborah Blum reported the US government pulled a similar stunt during prohibition, only with alcohol rather than sweets. Since bootleggers often stole industrial-grade alcohol to resell in drinkable form, the feds figured they'd dissuade potential customers by ordering industrial alcohol manufacturers to spike their wares with poison. Over Christmas 1926 the toxic hooch killed 31 partygoers in New York City alone; estimates for the poison programme's total death toll go as high as 10,000.
More details about our government's compassionate and completely non-psychopathic attempts to eliminate America's health problems once and for all can be found at the Guardian's America blog.