In Praise Of Civilized Behavior (Mine)

"Shut the hell up or you'll never get Christmas presents again because I'll go to the North Pole and CUT OFF SANTA'S HEAD."

That's the sort of thing you will never ever ever hear me say to the eternally screeching kids next door, because I am a respectable well-behaved civilized sweet-tempered grown-up person who understands the importance of not inflicting psychological scars on the next generation, no matter how much the little hellions might deserve it this second. Kudos to me!