Wednesday, June 11, 2008

Delayed Response

It’s been a rough couple of weeks; I lost one of my favorite barrettes and then found God, thus discarding atheism to embrace the theory of Belligerent Design, which says there does exist a Deity who created the universe just to piss me off.

Remember 18 months ago when I mounted a campaign to have the phrase “appoint Bob Barr” become a nationally recognized euphemism for going to the bathroom? It failed so spectacularly that he’s the Libertarian Party’s 2008 presidential candidate.

This is bad, O fellow libertarians of mine. You know how justifiably annoyed we get when folks accuse us of being mere “Republicans who like to smoke pot?” Well, “Republicans who like to imprison people who like to smoke pot” is worse.

Yes, I know Barr claims to have changed his mind, but with no explanation for this abrupt turnabout I view it with a gimlet eye. I’m not even asking for a mea culpa; I just want to hear why he switched from ‘We must imprison people who use non-alcoholic intoxicants’ to ‘No, we shouldn’t.’

Once again, my sincere desire to vote libertarian in the upcoming election is thwarted. So for this November I’m torn between two options: writing in a vote for Christopher Walken (since I’ve already endorsed him anyway) or staying home on election day and next morning tell people I voted for the major-party loser. That way, while America continues its inexorable swirl down history’s toilet, I can look all self-righteous and say “Don’t blame me; I voted for [Kodos].”

13 Comments:

Anonymous L.A. Lurker said...

I have similar feelings about Barr. I want to believe he had a change of heart, but then I remember his drug warrior days and wonder if he's for real. I will show up to vote, though, as my vote carries more weight with the local and state candidates, I guess. As for the major party presidential choices it's like being in prison and getting to choose between a guy named Bubba or a guy named Tank. Either way -- well, you know.

1:51 AM  
Blogger Scott said...

Join the great unwashed masses of proud non-voters. On that dreadful Tuesday proudly claim to your boss that you are going to stand in those two hour long lines to vote and instead go get a martini at the corner bar. That's where I'll be. Tossing them back in honor of... well... um... er...

Well I'm not sure what the martinis will be in honor of but after the first two who gives a damn.

5:23 AM  
Anonymous smartass sob said...

and then found God, thus discarding atheism to embrace the theory of Belligerent Design, which says there does exist a Deity who created the universe just to piss me off.

That really doesn't make much sense, since you, too, are part of the universe. However, I'm sure it will please Nostar immensely. ;-)

Speaking of gimlets, I just so happen to own a few of those. Very useful items, too. ;-)

Bob Barr a libertarian? Why not vote for a real libertarian like Nancy Reagan or Rush Limbaugh? How about Bill Maher or Lary King? Anyone can call themselves a libertarian these days - it's quite fashionable.

Why not just abstain? Why lend credibility or legitimacy to the whole thing - especially when nothing really changes anyway? I didn't vote last time and I probably won't this time unless it's to write in Ron Paul's name. And I'm not sure I'm all that crazy about him either.

7:29 AM  
Blogger Jennifer Abel said...

The LP shoulda gone with someone more eletable. Like say a crazy blue-skinned pornstar Druid type.

**SIGH**

9:00 AM  
Blogger WJW said...

The LP seems attracted to candidates who are accomplished critics, but who don’t have the first spark of leadership. The only thing America has seen Barr lead is the charge to impeach Clinton-- not exactly a memory libertairins wish to evoke in pro-civil rights lefties who should be our natural allies. Barr’s stance on government intrusion against our civil liberties is to be commended, but all he has done is criticize. Criticism isn’t leadership. Furthermore, after watching the LP Convention on CSPAN, he struck me as very, very smug… far from the image the LP should be showing the public. I sincerely wonder if the party will (or should) survive his candidacy.

9:15 AM  
Blogger Jennifer Abel said...

What's worse, WJW, is that he's criticizing his own behavior. He voted for the Defense of Marriage Act, he was a drug warrior who actually suggested that people who promote legalization be prosecuted under RICO statutes (to hell with the fist amendment) ... good God. I think the Republican Party is dying (and deservedly so, after the shenanigans of the last couple of decades), and this COULD be the LP's big chance to step into the vacuum ... but no. Better to blow it.

9:34 AM  
Anonymous smartass sob said...

He voted for the Defense of Marriage Act, he was a drug warrior who actually suggested that people who promote legalization be prosecuted under RICO statutes (to hell with the fist amendment) ...

Any idea what his position on military conscription is or has been? That one item, to me, has always been the litmus test of a principled libertarian - or a principed civil rights advocate for that matter.

12:04 PM  
Anonymous A Moose said...

this COULD be the LP's big chance to step into the vacuum ... but no. Better to blow it.

Unfortunately, I don't think so. There's the brainwashing of the two party system thing and the "wasted vote" mentality.

12:15 PM  
Anonymous A Moose said...

You could always vote for RP. He's only suspending his campaign.

2:08 PM  
Blogger Scott said...

wjw said "not exactly a memory libertairians wish to evoke in pro-civil rights lefties who should be our natural allies."

Are you out of your mind? The political left HATES Libertarians more than they hate Republicans. I've been provoking responses on a lefty newspaper comments page from lefties who think Libertarians need to be given ElectroShock Therapy to "cure" them of their "small government delusions".

The problem you are having here is in the language used by them. Lefties just don't speak the same language as the rest of us. Justice to them means "getting what you need" as in their wacky term "economic justice" which means "getting all the handouts your wallet can hold". "Civil Rights" means quotas and laws giving minorities special privileges as a form of revenge on evil white men, not equal treatment under the law. They think "States Rights" are secret code for "the south shall rise again".

Don't delude yourself into thinking the majority of lefties are natural allies of Libertarians. They are the natural allies of the State and nothing else.

5:29 PM  
Blogger Jim said...

I saw you talkin' with Christopher Walken on my TV screen.

5:57 PM  
Blogger Michelle In Ga said...

A good doomer would be stocking
a lifetime's supply of barrets.
M

11:01 AM  
Anonymous smartass sob said...

A good doomer would be stocking
a lifetime's supply of barrets.


Or learn how to craft them herself.

11:53 PM  

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