An Open Letter To All Jennifer Abel Fans
Fast forward to today: I'm not even watching the Olympics, yet I know that Canada won its first medal. How do I know this? And who won that medal? Take a wild guess.
This lucky, lucky planet of ours has indeed been blessed with an abundance of Jennifers Abel. However: I was not the Jennifer Abel who went to Beijing in 2008 as part of the Canadian Olympic diving team, nor am I the Jennifer Abel who recently won Canada's first medal in the 2012 London Olympics.
I have received some lovely, flattering and completely misaddressed e-mails, which I would like to forward to their intended recipient except I don't have her email address.
Here is how to tell the difference between me and my namesake in London: one Jennifer Abel is a black-haired, brown-skinned Quebecoise who's good at diving into swimming pools; the other is a red-haired, beige-skinned American who's good at diving into political scandals. (Also, one of the Jennifers Abel could be the other Jennifer Abel's mother, assuming the first Jennifer Abel was really, really stupid as a young teenager. I leave it to you to figure out which is which.)