Cat Stevens Totally Belonged At That Rally
Cat Stevens made the perfect guest because he's a right-wing propagandist's wet dream: "See, Islam's such a scary-toxic religion, it turns even a peaceful hippie musician into a murderously intolerant psycho who'd promote the death of anyone who offends him!"
Then Ann Coulter could run on stage brandishing a crucifix and screeching "I'll fix your clock! I'll kill your leaders and force you to convert to Christianity!" and Cat Stevens could respond "Morning has broken and so's your nose, bitch," and the two of them start going at it until suddenly their passionate hatred for each other morphs into regular passion and they rip off their clothes and choke on each other in flagrante soixante-neuf and the world is richer for having lost them.
In an alternate reality where the Islamic world went through a period of enlightenment and secularization, while Christendom remained the realm of theocracies, the United States of America has a predominantly Muslim population -- though its Founding Fathers did not intend it to be an officially "Muslim nation," no matter what right-wingers like to claim -- and the USA went completely, disproportionately and inappropriately bugshit in its response after a small band of Christian terrorists committed an atrocious attack nine years ago.
Now, in an attempt to get the country back on track, moderate secularized Muslim comic Stephen al-Colbert and moderate secularized Jewish comic Jon Stewart held their "Rally to Restore Fear/Sanity," and part of their message was "Seriously, not all Christians are crazy bigoted fanatics; most are just plain folks like you and me." To demonstrate this they introduced the rally's guest of honor, internationally famous Christian movie star Mel Gibson.